Lauri and myself (with a lovely photobomb from our friend Lyz! XD)
1. Tell us a little bit about yourself.
Let's see. I'm 28. Eternally young at heart though. I love cute things like unicorns, plushes, glitter, balloons. I also love the strange and macabre. I would need a whole other interview just to say everything about me : )
2. When did you discover lolita?
It was May 2009 at Anime Central. I fell in love with these girls wearing ruffly dresses and eating ice cream together. I wanted in! Unfortunately I was married to a man who was less than enthusiastic about the fashion: told me it was childish and fetishistic. Needless to say I am no longer with that man. My first real attempt at Lolita was in august 2010 at the First Midwest Lolita meet and greet.
3. Why do you dress in lolita?
I like how I feel in it. Both elegant and pretty but also fun and whimsical.
4. Do you have a favorite style or brand?
I mainly dress in sweet/bittersweet but I also love gothic, kuro, shiro, and punk. I don't own any brand currently but I do like Angelic Pretty and some prints by Alice and the Pirates line.
5. You were unfortunately recenetly diagnosed with stomach cancer, although you had been struggling with intestinal problems for a few months. Can you explain the progession that your body went through from the beginning of your pain to your diagnosis?
It all started probably in late April of this year. I've been having constant bouts of painful diarria, side and back pain, fever, exhaustion, general stomach troubles and I lost 20 lbs in one month. I had a CT scan to ensure my appendix was okay. Then, after visiting a GI, I had a colonoscopy and endoscopic surgery to remove parts of my stomach, gallbladder and pancreas. It wasn't until June 28th that I was diagnosed with stage one stomach cancer after freaking out cause I found blood in my stool.
6. Can you give us a few details on stomach cancer itself (the stage and what that means, what stomach cancer can do to the body, how it's being treated, etc - basically any info on the disease itself).
Stomach cancer is a scary form of cancer. It kills about 80,000 people a year! Usually by the time it's detected it's usually in the last stages. I was very lucky and pushed and pushed for more tests so I was diagnosed early. I am in stage one of the disease. I have a polyp that is cancerous in the left side of my stomach. It's also called carcinoma in situ, it's mainly in my muscle tissue. In the stage I'm in, it causes all the symptoms I explained above and others like poor appetite and poor nutritional absorption caused by poor diet. Stomach cancer can be caused by many things: genetics, smoking, abusing alcohol/drugs, environment, etc. Unfortunately I was just unlucky.
Im gonna go through 6 rounds of chemo. I'm lucky were my chemo is just shots in my stomach and not the normal intraveinous 8 hour long treatments. I have had one treatment so far ( as of July 4) and I'll be getting 3 more before the months over. I have an IV put in my arm for fluids and pain killers. Ever half an hour I get 5 shots put in my stomach. Then blood tests and X-rays. It's roughly a 2 hour doctors visit. On the 12th I'll be taking a pill camera ( a tiny camera I will swallow) to make sure my polyp hasn't gone into my bowels and then on the 18th im having an endoscopic ultrasound on top of them removing some of the polyp.
7. And how are you handling the treatement? Do you require any special accomodations to deal with the pain you've been in?
Dealing with cancer is an ordeal to say it bluntly. I was and still am an emotional wreck. I worry about losing my friends, my boyfriend, my life in all this. I really need to try to keep a positive outlook though. No one likes a mope : ) I currently take 4 pain killers a day to help me eat and help subside the pain. I'm physically very exhausted and cold, so I take more naps and wear more clothing than normal. Not fun when it's the summer.
8. Since you are being treated with chemo, there is a chance you will lose your hair, as well as a bit of weight. How does this effect you in regards to your own self-image, and your involvement in lolita fashion?
Oh my hair! That was honestly the first thing I cried about. Normally I don't care at all what people think about me: I'm tattooed, pierced, dress weirdly etc. But I like expressing myself through my hair. Yes, there are wigs but something about creating magic within your own hair is wonderful and artistic. I'm already roughly 100 lbs by the time this is done I might be close to 90. It's a little scary. With my current money situation I may not be able to afford new Lolita garments so I will have to make due with what I have, try to pin items snuggly etc.
To add on... It's also nerve wrecking to think of what the girls in my comm will think. Will they say I look ugly? Freakish? It is a thought that I do think about often.
9. Do you think that your illness will effect your involvement with the Chicago Lolita Community? Do you hope to remain as heavily involved as you have been, or take a break until you recover?
I'm gonna try very hard to keep as active as I am in the Lolita community. I love my ladies in my comm, they give me much joy and I think they'll help me through this process. I may miss one or 2 meet ups but that may be caused by exhaustion or stomach ailments after chemo.
10. What message do you have for lolitas with cancer?
My message is to please keep upbeat! Im gonna try to take my own advice too. Positive thinking helps in the worst situations. Lean on your family and friends, they are there for you. Even if they don't understand they care. And don't blow up at people for asking how you're doing. People care. I know you'll be sick of saying how you are every 5 minutes.
11. Any messages for lolitas who are friends or family members of people fighting cancer?
Please be supportive. Listen. Hugs, cuddles etc. All we (I) want at this moment is a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold or an ear to listen. Let that person know you care about them often- there will be moments when they will feel all is lost and want to give up. A card or tiny nonsensical gift is nice too. Okay, material goods sounds greedy but sometimes that item us a wonder. I carry a stuffed unicorn with me to my doctors visits. It helps.
12. If there was only one specific thing you wanted readers to take away from this interview, what would that be?
Life is short. Things happen that are horrible. Let the people you love, know that you love them.
13. Anything else you'd like to add?
I hope someone somewhere will take from this interview a bit of medical info and a bit of sparkly goodness that is me *^_^*
I am very grateful to Lauri for taking the time to answer my questions and share a little bit about herself and her situation with Teach Pretty! For anyone interested, she is currently writing a blog on her fight against stomach cancer: http://dinosaurcupcake.blogspot.com
As always, thank you for reading, and keep checking back for updates. I'm very pleased to see that I've lept from 4 to 10 followers here! Thank you very much for your support, everyone!